Friendship

January 26, 2007, Fr. Wilmer Tria had a talk regarding Bikol's perspective when it comes to friendship. Held Arrupe Convention, the talk tackled the way Bikolanos view the word "Friendship" and how they actually value it.

The talk started with word origins, particularly Bikolano words that are somehow related to what a friend would mean including "amigo" (everything that is about friendship), and "barkada" (group of friends, gang, clique). Bikolanos are actually friendly people and the way they treasure a friend is really extraordinary. There is a very close relationship between individuals who consider themselves friends. I believe that is inherent in the Filipino culture as they really establish good communications with their friends. Their culture shows how hospitable and loving people they are. Being remarkably known as the Texting Capital of the World, Philippines indeed has its value when it comes to good relationships with their friends. Most Filipinos couldn't even let a day pass without sending an SMS message to a friend- probably a forwarded message to reflect about life and love or just to say hi. Millions of telecom subscribers actually showcase not their value of security through communication, but beyond that, it is leaned towards our inherent personality of being friendly.

Unlike Tagalog which has its very translation for the word friend (kaibigan), most Bikolanos barely even know the existence of their own native term that goes hand and hand with the word friend. Such word is called "katuod", from the root word tuod, which, according to the dictionary published by Malcolm Mintz, is synonymous with being accustomed to, acquainted with, experienced, familiar with handy, proficient in, and used to.

Friendship is a product of long acquaintance. It is never earned overnight or in a one time meeting of two people. It takes a long process and in such process, they shall encounter problems and obstacles that would test the strength of their grip over each other. The main rule is to trust and never let go. Their values may clash at first, but in through passage of time, they will soon recognize their own values and understand more each other. One needs to have patience and learn to forgive. For, a genuine friendship is composed of people who are able to adjust with the difference of each other's value. It is a group composed of people ready to learn from each other and be sensitive enough about each other's feelings.

It has been said a dozen times that no man is an island. Companionship is an inherent human need. One desires to have a companion because having such provides security and assurance that he can have someone to lean on when he is down and he feels like the entire universe is against him.

Betrayal in a friendship also happens. It is a disvalue for friendship or an act that can destroy the foundation of a real friendship. In the people's life here on earth, they encounter dilemmas, and quarrels between some friends. People needs to realize how much they had and are willing to sacrifice for them so they can easily forgive them.

Friendship, according to Fr. Tria is like a relationship between the pitcher and the catcher in a baseball game. Both of them need to have good communication for it is the bloodline and the best tactic to win. Friendship, thus, is the value that must be present in a team to attain teamwork.